The Metric Martyrs are a group of pugnacious, ignorant ass-clowns who are so unable to grasp that the metric system of measurements (kilos, metres and centigrade) is superior to the illogical, outdated imperial system (lbs, feet, Fahrenheit). The strength of their conviction is so strong that every single tubthumping little-Englander in there would gladly be lined up in front of a freshly-dug pit in a forest and shot in the back of the head, their bodies tumbling inelegantly into the soil, rather than go metric. Their willingness to defend WITH THEIR VERY LIVES the imperial system and, by extension the return of the slave trade, forced child labour and the rescinding of voting rights for women is how they have arrived at the title metric martyrs.
The lederhosen-clad sausage eating krauts will no doubt ride roughshod over all things that make Britain as peculiarly backward as it is. Destroying our natural right to drink piss-weak bathwater pints of Fosters by the pint, replacing them with 500mls of premium German lagers and fine French wines by the litre. Their outrage is naturally bordering on the suicidal.
Children are being forced by the intolerable Eurocrat filth to learn to divide things by ten and 100, rather than the much more logical 14s and 12s of their youth. Since decimalisation of our currency in 1972, the England they so fondly remember has gone even further to the dogs with people literally weeping blood as they claw at their face in despair over the incomprehensible ‘common sense’ approach to money that brought Britain in line with the rest of Earth.
Metric martyrs should just try and learn, learn that kilos are better. If they think that anyone is trying to ‘take their pint away from them’ then they’re the sort of reactionary dunces we should have expelled to the colonies centuries ago.
